Kristen Kalloniatis

On the 20th of August 2020 I got my first positive pregnancy test. Covid was here and not going anywhere, our overseas trip was cancelled so we decided the baby we wanted to try for why not just do it now.

We were so incredibly lucky to fall pregnant within two months and I remember walking to the shops and suddenly getting an overwhelming feeling of tiredness and lethargy. This was unusual and then it all clicked. My period wasn’t showing signs of coming and my boobs were more tender than usual. My partner Dave was cooking dinner and I snuck into the bathroom with some tests, first one - positive, digital, pregnant 1-2 weeks. It was his birthday within the next few weeks, so I put together a box of baby items I had and surprised him the next day. We were so happy.

We had so many friends just announce their pregnancies it felt like all the stars were aligning. To share such a beautiful journey with all our closest friends was so exciting.

I booked a GP appointment and was given blood work papers to confirm pregnancy and an overwhelming amount of information. Private or public? Do you have an obstetrician? So much I hadn’t thought about amid all the excitement. She asked how I was feeling, I was tired and lethargic, a few weird pains but nothing unmanageable.

I went straight to pathology and was told the GP would call with the results most likely within a day or two. When I received the call, she said my levels were low and she wanted to retest to make sure they were rising as they should. Second blood test looked good, and GP was happy with how my HCG levels where rising. Phew. Other than those few symptoms from early on also experienced some mild waves of nausea and mild but consistent cramping. Although the bloods looked good the cramping was on my mind constantly. It would come and go but overall was there for the entire time. I would stressfully google if it’s normal, convinced myself it was fine and learnt along the journey that google is not your friend or should be relied on.  

A quick google search after my first GP appointment to frantically choose an OB led me to the most amazing OB. I honestly couldn’t have imagined anyone else to guide me through the next few weeks.

In my first OB appointment she asked me how I was feeling, and I just said overall good, just some mild cramping, no sickness and just tired all the time. Time to check things - an exciting, but nervous feeling. I jumped up on the bed and laid down, the plan was to try an external ultrasound and then if need be, we were to do the scan internally. We start the external ultrasound and I remember thinking; this doesn’t look right. She was having trouble finding the right angle and said let’s do an internal as I think there’s multiples….. cue mild freak out…. My partner is a twin, surely not - but also exciting.

We start the internal and again, it didn’t look right, lots of white and black circles and no clear heartbeat/s could be found. She was a bit stumped and asked to bring someone else in to look and do another ultrasound. Confirmed my thoughts, something isn’t right, I just knew it.

Whilst waiting for the second OB to come in she was asking me a few questions about my last period and checking blood results. Her colleague came in, we did another internal scan. Her colleague asked if I had any bleeding, none I said - had been sick, again no, just mild waves of nausea.

My OB turned to me and started to unpack it all for me to understand. Unfortunately, the pregnancy hadn’t gone as it should and I had what’s called a molar pregnancy. A rare complication that can occur caused by an abnormal fertilised egg. I was told there are two types, compete molar or partial molar which would be determined once tissue was tested. The consistent cramping now made sense; my uterus was essential growing cysts / sacs - also explains why the OB thought it was multiples at first. They were surprised I hadn’t had any bleeding or more nausea as they said a lot of women who have molar pregnancies are quite sick.

I was told a D&C would be needed and it needed to happen quickly. The surgery had was booked for that week and with Covid there was added stress with the process of going to get a Covid test the morning of, which lead to tell the testing site why I needed my test to be priority.

Surgery done, now to recover, grieve and wait for the results. We are so incredibly lucky to have some amazing family who sent us meals, flowers and love. As we started to process and open up to more people the love and support just grew.

I’ll never forgot I was told “it’s ok to grieve and be sad about this pregnancy” yes it might happen again and you’re still young, but it doesn’t take away that you wanted THIS pregnancy. After hearing this I really leaned into my thoughts, listened to my body and didn’t rush anything. I pushed back going back to work and took the time I needed.

The results of my tissue came back, and it was the least favourable of the two. A complete molar pregnancy. I wasn’t prepared for the limitations this meant. Weekly, fortnightly then monthly blood tests to ensure my HGC levels were going down and stayed down for a total of 6 months. Six months of being told to not get pregnant which meant more waiting. Although that time frame felt like it was an eternity away, I really took this time to prepare my body and focus on me. Lots of workout classes, yoga and acupuncture and before I knew it the 6 months was up.

We were able to officially start trying again in March 2021. I knew that meant a Xmas baby, but we thought it won’t happen first try. Well low and behold it did. Due to the previous pregnancy, the excitement of testing and telling my partner was a little more conservative and we approached it with more caution that we did the first time around. It wasn’t really until after the 20 weeks mark, I started to enjoy the pregnancy but even so each milestone and scan was still meet with some anxiety.

After a year and a half of our journey to become parents on December 19, 2021, we welcomed our beautiful rainbow baby boy Jack. We were home on December 23rd and were able to wrap up the year on a high as a new family in the newborn bubble.